What happens when your idea of love gets turned upside down? How do you function when all you know turns out to be false? Where do you turn when reality ceases to exist in the same manner in which you’ve lived your entire life?
This is what the healing process brings. Our most important need in life is to be loved and to love other people. Without it we are not able to function with sanity. Because of our fallen nature, however, we love imperfectly. As Christians, we have the opportunity to see an example in Christ of perfect love and to emulate it as closely as we know how, but it’s a lifelong process.
In that process we often find that what we’ve understood to be love is actually a mixture of experience and beliefs that typically lack many qualities of true love. When we realize this, life can seem unknowable, desparate, fragile and confusing. After all, your entire life was lived out of what you understood to be love for yourself and others.
This is where I am. I am figuring out how to love after realizing that my ideals were less than ideal, my truths were tainted with strands of lies and my heart could not find peace in the decisions my flesh would make.
To say the least this is a difficult process. It requires letting go of my plans and trusting God to guide my path. It requires that my truths be fluid so that I’m teachable in every way. And it requires that I seek after the one who is Love.
He is faithful. He is faithful. He is faithful.
When healing happens, life will ultimately fall into place, but allowing yourself to set the stage for those pieces means finding peace in the calamity if change.