Being single and male has its perks. We get to focus on our jobs and nobody questions it. We get to live the “bachelor” lifestyle and people expect nothing different. We also get to prepare our lives to one day include a woman in them. For many, this may not seem like a big deal, but it’s more difficult than one might image. I’ve come up with a few things that are also the guy’s job in preparing for a life that may one day include marriage.
It’s the guy’s job to seek out a woman, not who is perfect, but who has been prepared and is being prepared for this moment in time. It’s the guy’s job to discern and hear from God who He says is ready for relationship. It’s the guy’s job to see beyond beauty, beyond intelligence, beyond family, beyond wealth and look at the heart of the woman. This often takes time and patience. She is not one to be handled roughly, but with care and kindness. Her heart must be protected at all cost, her joy sought out, her ways known, her love gained. Why?
Because that’s how Jesus sees his bride, the Church. He woos her ever so gently. He looks beyond all the blemishes and sees past the hurt in her eyes. He knows she doesn’t trust easily because she has been hurt by life. Yet, he pursues. He seeks to know her, but realizes that only she can decide how much she lets Him into her life. She continues to grapple internally with her identity, but He calls her beautiful. He protects her heart by allowing her to come to Him when she is ready, always standing with open arms. He seeks out her joy by whispering kind words in her ear. He learns her ways as He watches as she move to and fro, steady and fleeting, but with a compassionate heart. He gains her love by always being there, by building trust, by finding small ways to make her smile. He loves her so.
Yes, it’s the guy’s job to love a woman as Jesus loves the Church.